If you REALLY Loved Jesus

Have you ever felt in your heart that dread that follows sin?  You know that feeling you get when you have just given in to an addictive/habitual sin (and often it is within hours, even minutes, of pledging to never do it again)?  That voice that you hear loud and clear that says, “if you really were a Christian, if you REALLY LOVED JESUS, then this wouldn’t be an issue.”

I can tell you with absolute certainty that if you have felt this or if you even are feeling it right this very moment, that you are not alone.  The reason I can say this with such certainty is that I feel it.  I have felt it.  And, guess what, just the other day, I heard a room full of people talking about how they feel it.  Oh how freeing it was to hear that I wasn’t alone in my feelings, to realize that the enemy is predictable and therefore defeat-able.

As I have mentioned before, I have struggled with just about every aspect of sexual sin since, truthfully, before I can remember.  Still as an adult, a married woman, the battle is fought daily.  Old habits die hard and desire can be like an all consuming fire when it is not within God’s design.  And to make matters worse, I constantly hear the words of the enemy when he says that I can’t possibly be saved because if I was, I for sure wouldn’t be dealing with this anymore.

These thoughts, however, are tools of the oppressor.  They are used by the evil one against us to keep us from living freely.  Scripture states clearly that we are not alone in our temptations (1 Corinthians 10:13).  Jesus himself fought every battle we fight.  Just because He was God did not make him any less human and therefore any less susceptible to temptation.  In the same verse that tells us that we are not alone in our temptation, God promises us that He will provide a way out for us.  He will provide a way for you to endure it.  I’ve read that in the original text the meaning of “endure” has to do with a word picture of someone being able to stand under a heavy weight.  The weight is still there.  The verse says nothing about God taking the temptation away from me.  He simply says that I do not have to fail and that HE will provide me the strength to stand under it.

You see, it really has nothing to do with my love for Christ or not.  Despite what the enemy may tell me, my failure does not represent a lack of relationship.  I fail every day at being the wife I was created to be but that doesn’t mean I am no longer my husband’s wife or that I do not love him (and I do not think that anyone would accuse me of either of those offenses).  It simply means that I failed that day and that I am going to pick myself up and try to do a better job tomorrow.  It is the same thing with my relationship with Christ.  When I remember that He died for me, even thought He knew who I would be and what I would do, I am also reminded that His love is enough.  His death was the price that was paid and I don’t have to worry about how often I fail.  His grace is enough.  He decided before the day He thought me into existence that I was worth dying for and I have to just accept that as fact and move on.  Dwelling on my constant failure is not what He intends for me and it is not what He intends for you either.  Yes, there is responsibility in relationship.  Let us not forget our responsibility.  However, there is also grace and we get to freely accept it and then turn around and freely give it and live it.

“Worth Dying For” – MikesChair

You might be the wife,
Waiting up at night
You might be the man,
Struggling to provide
Feeling like it’s hopeless

Maybe you’re the son,
Who chose a broken road
Maybe you’re the girl,
Thinking you’ll end up alone
Praying God can you hear me?
Oh God are you listening?

Am I more than flesh and bone?
Am I really something beautiful?
Yeah, I wanna believe, I wanna believe that
I’m not just some wandering soul
That you don’t see and you don’t know
Yeah I wanna believe, Jesus help me believe that I
Am someone worth dying for

I know you’ve heard the truth that God has set you free
But you think you’re the one that grace could never reach
So you just keep asking, what everybody’s asking

Am I more than flesh and bone?
Am I really something beautiful?
Yeah, I wanna believe, I wanna believe that
I’m not just some wandering soul
That you don’t see and you don’t know
Yeah I wanna believe, Jesus help me believe that I
Am someone worth dying for

You’re worth it, you can’t earn it
Yeah the Cross has proven
That you’re sacred and blameless
Your life has purpose

You are more than flesh and bone
Can’t you see you’re something beautiful
Yeah you gotta believe, you gotta believe
He wants you to see, He wants you to see
That you’re not just some wandering soul
That can’t be seen and can’t be known
Yeah you gotta believe, you gotta believe that you
Are someone worth dying for

You’re someone worth dying for
You’re someone worth dying for

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2 thoughts on “If you REALLY Loved Jesus

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